Vampires don't have a lot of "natural predators."

Image credit: Telegraph.co Image description: VanHelsing brandishing a cricifix. End description.

Sure, most undead, blood-sucking vampires don't get along with werewolves but in terms of strength they're pretty equally matched and stay out of each other's way. Energy vampires, psy-vamps, sanguinarians, etc. don't generally have issues with our lycan friends, however. (By the way, if these words are at all new to you don't worry. There's no quiz at the end of this page. Or is there? Muhahaha.)

I mean sure, Christians have never liked us but what's an old guy in a robe with a wooden crucifix gonna do to a swarm of super-strong goths with weapons for eyeteeth? They used to be more of a threat, back when they'd kill a whole slew of their fellow humans on the off-chance that one was a witch. I think they got like two witches during the entire era of witch trials. You tell me who the monster is.

Image credit: Supernatural (2005) Image description: Sam, Dean, and Cas from Supernatural standing and staring down at the camera. End description.

Nowadays, the only real threat to a vampire is a vampire hunter. These assholes are gritty little pests. Human beings who spend their lives studying vampires and how to kill them are few and those who put those lessons to practice are fewer, but they're a real thorn in my side. Whether you're talking about Van Helsing, The Winchesters, Rayna Cruz, or any of the real ones, vampire hunters are annoying at best and deadly at worst.

I'm not going to tell you which of their methods work because I'm not risking my neck, but if you know a vampire hunter just know that the longer they've been in the practice, the better their methods work -or the luckier they are. FYI, hanging out with vampire hunters doesn't usually go well for people. Don't be an innocent bystander.

Image credit: Etsystatic Image description: A vampire hunter's kit complete with holy water, crucifixes, silver, knives, gold, stakes, photographs, and bibles. End description.

You can often recognize a vampire hunter in the same ways you can recognize a vampire. They're usually covered in bloodstains, they carry around a lot of weird shit, and they spend most of their waking hours in the dark. A seasoned vampire hunter carries around a case much like this one, with holy water, garlic, wooden stakes, knives, silver bullets, crucifixes, bibles, amulets, etc. Only some of those things actually work, but some of them work on other creatures even if they don't work on vampires.

But regardless of whether it'll kill you or not, being pelted with cloves of garlic or having bible verses screamed at you is pretty annoying.

Image credit: Vampire Hunter D Image description: The cover of Vampire Hunter D Volume 1. End description.

Now, back to vampires.